March 31st, 2011, by Shelley Riutta
What habits do you have that hold you back? Is it procrastination, overeating, watching too much T.V., not exercising etc? I’m sure you can easily rattle off what these unhealthy habits are for you . I’m sure you have maybe struggled with one or two of these habits for years. You may have been able to stop your unhealthy habit for a week, a month or maybe even a few months. What is it going to take for this to be completely eliminated from your life?
One of the first things to do is understand at a deeper level how this unhealthy habit serves you–how it helps you on some level. A great way to find this out is to actually dialogue with the unhealthy habit. Take out a piece of paper and with your dominant hand–the hand that you write with- ask the question to your habit “How do you help me?” and then close your eyes and see what pops into your head–even if it doesn’t make sense to you–and then write it down with your non-dominant hand. Writing with your non-dominant hand is a way to to access more of the unconscious information inside of you. If you have tried to consciously change a pattern for years and haven’t had success, you know that there is an unconscious pattern that needs to be understood and addressed.
You will be surprised at what information you will find out by doing this exercise. You may find out that your procrastination says back to you “I’m afraid if you do this you will fail and I want to protect you from this–so I won’t let you finish it.” Reassuring your procrastination that there really is no failure only learning–and by taking the risk and completing the task–that is the success–not the actual outcome. The other thing to let your procrastination know is that your performance does not define you—what you create or do is an expression of you, but does not define who you are. Who you are is already whole and complete and cannot be diminished by any of your actions–or outcomes of things that you create or do.
What do your unhealthy habits have to say to you? Ask and find out the good reasons why they are doing what they are doing!
March 28th, 2011, by Shelley Riutta
“You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing you feel you cannot do.” ~ Eleanor Roosevelt
“All I have seen teaches me to trust the Creator for all I have not seen.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Faith is a bird that feels the dawn breaking and sings while it’s still dark.” ~Scandinavian Saying
When I first began to do Breathwork with clients, I would sit alongside of them as they would do the deep breathing pattern that is a part of the Breathwork process. At times I would feel the temperature change in the room and it was like a cool breeze was moving through the room. Moments after I would feel that sensation, the client would comment to me that they were feeling a lot of fear and that they felt cold. I was amazed how fear had such a profound impact on their body and that I could also feel this emanating from them as well. Such is the power of fear on a person.
How does fear manifest in your life? Do you get immobilized? Do you worry obsessively? Do you try to control others or the outcome of events? Does it stop you from pursuing what you really want? Does it keep you up at night? We are living in a culture of fear—with fearful events being a main focus on the news, written about in the newspapers and frequently talked about in the conversations with others.
Years ago I made a decision to not watch the news or read the newspaper as a way for me to eliminate this bias of fear and negativity in my life. It is not that I don’t care about what is happening in the world—it is that I believe that there is a much broader range of news that reflects more accurately what is happening in the world. For every act of hate and unkindness there are 100’s of acts of true kindness and caring happening between people. We have become addicted to the sensationalism of horrific and dramatic events.This takes a toll on us and our sense of well-being in the world.
How does this affect us personally? I believe that because of the energy of fear being so present in the world that we are affected personally—just like I was affected by the fear of my client who was in a state of fear. It is like moving through an energy of fear in your day to day life and if you are not conscious and aware of this you can get pulled down by it. What I have noticed in my work with clients is that if they move into a state of fear—this can be exacerbated by the collective fear that is already present in the broader energy of the world. So what I do is work with clients is to assist them with tools to work through their fear quickly so they don’t get stuck in it.The following are reasons that I don’t like clients to get stuck in fear.
Reasons to NOT get Stuck in Fear
1. Being in Fear makes you susceptible to being pulled down into a greater amount of fear by the fear that is present in the world. So what might be a small fear can turn into a much bigger fear because of the collective fear that is in the air.Like attracts like—so the denser energy of fear will attract more fear—and blow the small fear you had into a bigger fear.
2. Being in Fear removes you from the Flow of Life- The natural flow of life is easy and light. Being in fear creates a dense, heavy energy in your body so you can’t connect with the lighter flow of life. When you are in the flow of life you will get insights and intuition about how to handle the situations that you are faced with. When you are in the denser energy of fear you are cutting yourself off from these insights that could actually help you with the situation at hand.
3. Fear clouds your vision of situations- When you are looking through the lens of fear you won’t be able to see situations clearly. I remember a client of mine who was in a state of fear and listened to a phone message. She interpreted the message negatively and was upset. She said later when she was in a good mood she listened to the message again and was very surprised that she heard it so differently. She really got that her state of mind was influencing how she “heard” the message.So staying out of fear will help you see situations more clearly so you can respond in a way that will be most helpful to you.
4. Most Fear is Not Real- Most of our fears are projections of things will never come to pass. It is a non-productive emotion. In a classic study of worry, college students kept a “worry journal” for a solid month. At the end of that time, the students were asked to carefully go over their list, and check each worry that had actually come true. On the average, the researchers found that around 90% of the things these students worried about never came true at all! The researchers concluded: worry is not worth the effort. The only function of true fear is when it is of real and present danger—like you are going to be attacked by a wild animal and your life is in danger. That is fear of real and present danger. Fortunately we live in a country and time period that is relatively safe and our lives are not threatened on a daily basis. The other thing to remember is that we are eternal spiritual beings and we cannot be “killed”. Our physical body can be harmed and our human form can die—but we—our essential Spirit does not die.So our physical form can be hurt—but our Spirit can never be hurt, damaged or killed.
5. Fear is not Fun-Being in fear is very unpleasant and definitely not FUN. Our time here on earth is so short—we may as well have a lot of fun. Fear is not productive and does not move us ahead in our life—it actually holds us back.Ultimately you have the choice of where you are channeling your energy—and if the choice is between fear and fun—choose fun.
So you see the importance of not being in fear.Now we will go over tips to help you to shift from Fear to Faith.The more you practice these- the easier it will get –and then you will be living your life from a feeling of strong faith and trust rather than fear.
Tips to Transform Fear into Faith
1. Trust that you are being led to your Highest Good- How would you feel if you knew that everything you were experiencing in your life—the joyous events and the challenging ones were all for your highest good—and these events were leading you to something even better? So much worry and fear is related to the fear that things are not going to go as we would like them to and that we will miss out on something we think would make us happy. If you look back on your life notice that the most challenging times for you were the most transformative and did lead you to something better—even beyond what you could have conceived in your own mind.Trust that this will continue. Trust the divine unfolding of your life and that things are on track even if you feel in the moment that they are off track.
2. Ask yourself “What Can I Learn from This?”- When you are gripped with fear about a situation see if you can ask yourself—“How can I use this situation to learn and grow—rather than to be immobilized in fear?” This will shift you immediately from feeling like a victim—“this is happening to me and I have no power”—to a more empowered stance—“how can I use this to grow—what gift of learning does this situation contain?”Moving into a more empowered perspective will automatically move you out of fear and allow you to learn from the situation rather than get stuck.
3. Identify what you are telling yourself that is creating the Fear- Fear is actually self-created by what you are telling yourself about the situation. Let’s say that you feeling fear that you may lose your job. If we track back in your mind to the thoughts you were thinking that were creating the fear the thoughts would be “The economy is not doing well—I may lose my job” and then the next thought “If I lose my job—what will I do—there are no other jobs in my field in this area, I will have to move.” “I don’t want to move—I really love it here—now I am really afraid.” This is an example of the domino effect of a fearful thought—one fearful thought leads to another –to another etc. until the fear is quite big.
What if at the beginning you caught that fearful thought and responded back to it from a higher, trusting, more connected part of you—so in response to the thought “The economy is not doing well—I may lose my job” this higher part of you responded back “There is no evidence that my job is in jeopardy—so I don’t need to worry” or “If I would lose my job I trust that it meant that there was an even better job out there for me—that would be exciting!” You can see how the response to the fearful thought will determine if you will stay in fear or move into faith. Practice responses that are more faith focused like “I can handle whatever comes my way” “Whatever happens I know it will lead to amazing things for me” “Everything is unfolding perfectly in my life.”
4. Surround Yourself with People, Books, News that are Optimistic and Hopeful- Until you internalize a strong feeling of trust and faith you may need to make sure you surround yourself with people and information that inspire these feelings. Eliminate news that is scary, don’t spend as much time with your friend who is so fearful and don’t expose yourself to things that will trigger fear in you. Read books that are hopeful and inspirational—spend time with people who fuel your faith and trust in the goodness of life. If you have someone in your life who has strong faith and trust—notice how much easier, fun and light their life is. These people can be role models for you to embrace that level of faith also. It may take practice to stay in the state of faith, but the more you do it the easier it will be to shift into that state and stay there.
5. Do the Things You think You Cannot Do- Begin to act and take risks that move you out of your comfort zone. I remember once reading that you should challenge yourself to do one thing every day that you are afraid of. It could be something as simple as voicing your opinion when you would have kept quiet instead. It could be something bigger—like enrolling in school to pursue your dream instead of waiting until you are no longer afraid. Just because there is fear doesn’t mean you can’t do something. You can use the phrase “I feel the fear and do it anyway.” Many people who pursue and achieve their dreams report that they felt fear every step of the way, but they did not let it stop them. Don’t let fear stop you; practice acting in spite of your fear and you will get better at not allowing it to hold you back in your life.
6. Use What You’re Afraid of as Feedback for an Area You Need To Grow In- If you fears tend to have a central theme—see if you can understand where the root cause of this may be. For example if your fears tend to be around the fear of losing someone close to you—do you have unresolved grief from a previous loss of someone close to you? Or if many of your fears center around feeling insecure—you may need to do some work to see your own worth and lovability more clearly. These reoccurring fears may be signaling a deeper healing that is important for you and they won’t go away until you address the root issue.
7. Eliminate Worry- One of the main ways that fear gets expressed is through our worries. Worry is a projection of a fearful event we think will come to pass. As mentioned previously in this article 90% of our worries never come to pass. To prove this to yourself try keeping a worry journal for the next 2 weeks and just jot down your worries as they come to you. Then a month later—look at the worries and see how many of them truly came to pass. Also notice the content of the worries—was the event you worried about something you could control or not control? If it is an event in which you have no control—than why worry? I have worked with clients who have an irrational belief that if they worry about something enough that they can somehow prevent that event from happening. Once they get that this doesn’t work and is just causing them needless suffering—they are able to let it go.If it is a worry that you do have control over than instead of worrying, focus on planning.
8. Plan more and Worry Less- If the event you are worrying about is within your control and you can have a positive impact on what happens -than channel your energy into planning, not worrying. This will help you shift from feelings of powerlessness that come from worrying—to a more positive, empowered stance of feeling in control of your life. When you are worrying—ask yourself “Is this something I have control over?” –if so then stop worrying and instead develop a plan to address it. If you don’t have control over what you are worrying about than just let it go.If this is challenging to do—try developing a positive statement or a positive image (you on the beach) as a replacement to the unnecessary worry. I have a client who recently told me she uses the song “You are my sunshine” as her replacement when she is in worry or negativity.
9. Don’t Worry, Be Happy- One of the major findings regarding happy people is that they worry a lot less than most others do. It is not so much that happy people have no problems or concerns; it’s just that they don’t dwell on them. The more time you spend in worry and fear—the less time you have for happiness and joy. This is your choice moment by moment.
10. Use Having Fun as a Way to Shift Out of Fear- One way to help yourself shift out of fear is to do something that is fun for you. It could be something as simple as singing your favorite song, listening to music you love, watching a funny show that cracks you up. Fun and fear are opposite emotional states and moving into fun can help you let go of your fear. So next time you feel fear or panic set in say to yourself “It’s time to go and have some FUN!”
Staying in Faith rather than Fear will help your life flow more smoothly.If you can imagine your life as a float down a river—the more you relax and stay in faith, you can enjoy the journey more –trusting you are going to even better places than you can even imagine!
March 24th, 2011, by Shelley Riutta
One of the things that is so fascinating for me is when I meet with people either clients or out socially and I notice that they really don’t get how wonderful they are. They can’t see the the light, the love, the magnificence of who they really are. They are caught up in a self-perception that is inaccurate and untrue. It could be a self-perception that is based on negative comments people made to them as a kid “You are so stupid” “Why are you doing it that way” “What is wrong with you”. Or it could be based on what they interpreted by the way others treated them example: if their parents were caught up in their own pain and struggles and didn’t spend time with them they may have interpreted this as “I am not worthy enough to spend time with–something is wrong with me”.
As a child and oftentimes as an adult people don’t understand that if someone is saying hurtful things or treating someone in unloving ways- it means that their hearts are closed and they are unable to see themselves or the other person clearly. I say to clients that the comments they hear that are hurtful are coming from someone who has a closed heart—therefore their perception is distorted. It is like this person is looking through a dirty window and they only see the dirt, but not what is really on the other side of the window. If someone’s heart is open their vision is clear and they can see accurately.
So if you think back to hurtful comments you have heard from people–trust that their hearts were closed and they weren’t seeing you clearly and these comments are not true. If you think back to the loving comments you have heard from others-trust that these comments were coming from someone whose heart was open and therefore they were able to see you clearly–these comments are true!
What happens is people hear these hurtful comments or experience someone being unloving to them -they take these as true and accurate. This then distorts their own vision of themselves. They too are looking at themselves through a distorted lens that is blocking out the truth of who they really are. I suggest to clients to catch themselves when they are operating from an old false view of themselves that are inaccurate. Then if they open their own hearts to themselves with an intention to see themselves through the eyes of love–they can see the truth of who they really are.
Exercise to see your Authentic Self more Clearly
Try this right now. Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths. Breath into your heart and imagine a color that represents unconditional love—see this color filling and opening your heart. Feel this color permeating your body–this energy of love. Then ask your intuition and the highest part of you to show you a vision of who you really are in your minds eye. The vision may come in vibrant colors of your essence, or images of you as a loving child or some other image that helps you to see yourself more accurately. Trust what comes and see this as the truth of who you really are!
March 21st, 2011, by Shelley Riutta
Do you have clarity about your life path? Do you have a clear direction that you are heading? One of the complaints that I hear from people seeking counseling is that they feel confused about what they want to do with their life. They may be at a crossroads or they have had a very long period of time of not having a clear direction. As they get to know and understand themselves on a deeper level through the counseling process -this clarity of direction begins to emerge. When people are confused it is because they are in their wounded self–the conditioned part of them concerned with what others think–and externals. The clarity of direction is contained in their Authentic Self—who they really are inside. As they get to know their Authentic Self (who they really are) and stay focused on this–the direction in life becomes very clear. It can take some time and soul searching, but it will lead to clarity.
What kinds of things to people do to connect with their Authentic Self? A common exercise I do with clients is to start separating the voice of their Wounded Self from their Authentic Self. How can you tell if the voice is Wounded or Authentic? If it is coming from your Wounded Self it typically will be a statement that is fear based and oftentimes a limiting belief based on past conditioning. The difficulty that people have is that these limiting beliefs are running around in their head and they take these as true and act upon them. Today I heard a statement on a radio show where the presenter challenged people’s “logical” thinking. She asserted that oftentimes when people think they are being rational and logical it is coming from conditioned thought patterns that they have absorbed from their family and have never challenged! So be careful about your thinking–when you think you are making a “logical” decision you may be just acting upon an unchallenged limiting belief that you have inherited.
Thursday I will go over another exercise to help you connect more with your Authentic Self.
Watch your thinking today and notice if you are in a old Wounded thought pattern. Shift gears and connect with the expanded, positive thinking of your Authentic Self–and clear the way for clarity about your life direction.
March 17th, 2011, by Shelley Riutta
We all want to feel good–yet most people don’t feel good–or don’t feel good consistently. The secret is that you can use your not so good feelings as indicators that you are off track. Whenever you are depressed, anxious or upset–these feelings are giving you information that your thoughts are out of alignment with your true nature–your authentic self.
Let’s take the example of depression—what kind of thoughts create depression? Thoughts like “I will never get what I want” “I am stuck in this situation I don’t like and I can’t do anything about it” “I am worthless” “I don’t deserve good things” “Nobody cares about me”. These are examples of “off track” thinking—the thinking of your conditioned self-your false self. Let’s replace each of those thoughts with the truth from the truest part of you, your authentic self–your spirit. The thoughts of your authentic self are positive and supportive:
- I will never get what I want shifts to >>>>>>>>> I can achieve anything I set my mind to
- I am stuck in this situation I don’t like and I can’t do anything about it shifts to>>>>>I have choices in every situation and I can make a choice to find a better situation or shift myself so this feels better–I have the power to do this
- I am worthless becomes>>>>> I am an amazing being who is lovable and incredible with so many gifts to share!
- I don’t deserve good things shifts to>>>>>I deserve everything that would make my heart sing, my happy heart helps those around me and I become a beacon of hope for others
- Nobody cares about me shifts to >>>>I have so much love around me each and every moment–from the people in my life, all the people who have ever loved me and from the spiritual realm
If you are not feeling great then check in and see what your false self is saying and write those thoughts down and do the above exercise. The more you shift your thoughts to the positive thoughts of your authentic self–the easier it becomes to do it. Eventually these thoughts will be the only thoughts you will be entertaining–and then you will be living from the Joy of your authentic self–and this is how you were meant to live!
March 14th, 2011, by Shelley Riutta
We all have limits on the amount of Joy we allow ourselves to feel–based on our fears and false beliefs about Joy. There is always a higher level of Joy that we can reach for—there are no limits! It is time for you to feel more Joy in your life NOW! For many people they have suffered so much in their life that they have a back log of Joy that needs to be felt and expressed. Here are some tips to blow the lid of your Joy Limit!
- Take a chance–do something goofy and out of the ordinary today. Start dancing with your co-worker, tell a joke, tell joyful story to someone, smile and be extra friendly to someone at the grocery store.
- Think about what you love about your life and tell someone about it. Share your Joy with someone else. Ex. “I love my kids so much, they bring so much joy to my life. “I love that I am healthy and that I am able to do the things I love to do.”
- Put on the music and DANCE! Let go of self-judgment and let yourself dance. EVERYBODY is a good dancer and I believe everyone deep down inside loves to dance. What keeps you from loving it is your own self-consciousness and fears about what other people will think. Let go of what they think and just dance?
- Put on the music and SING! On your way home from work today—put on some of your favorite music and SING–or make up your own song. I believe everyone has a beautiful voice and we are meant to me singing throughout the day.
- Make a plan to do something that brings you Joy this next weekend that you haven’t done in awhile. Plan joyful things in your schedule and treat these activities as essential ways to feed your Spirit. Doing the things that bring you Joy will give you more energy. So if you are feeling low energy— it is time to plan for some more Joy.
- Feel the Joy of the Present Moment- Drop out of your head and into your body. Let go of worry about the future. Whatever you are doing right now–find the joy right here and now. Feel the sensations of moving your body, seeing everything around you, really feel and be present for the interactions with other people. Find the Joy of the moment.
Set your intention to blow the lid off of your Joy Limits and watch your life Transform!
What is your favorite way to shift into Joy?
March 14th, 2011, by Shelley Riutta
Claire came to see me because she was on break from college. She was confused because she had a strong desire to spend time alone. She said “I don’t want to talk to any of my friends or even my boyfriend who I really like–I just want to hang out in my room and read–I’m not sure why.”
We explored what things had been like for her over her semester at school. She said that a lot of her friends were struggling with some pretty intense issues—depression, relationship issues and family conflicts. Claire is energetically sensitive–meaning she is very sensitive to the energy around her–particularly the emotions that others are feeling. Because she doesn’t have tools to handle this sensitivity and buffer herself from the energy of those around her–she did what seemed to make sense to her at the time–which was to try to help her friends feel better. If they felt better than the energy around her would feel better—therefore she would feel better. She became the resident therapist and everyone would come and talk to her about what was going in and she would try and help them.
Instead of her friends getting support from her to figure out their own problems—they instead began to rely on her to figure these problems out for them. In the language of Inner Bonding she was playing the role of the Loving Adult for them. The more she was playing the role of this for them–the less they were playing it for themselves and they began to flounder even more. They felt better temporarily and maybe got some ideas to handle the current situation at hand—but the next issue that would come up—they would go right back to asking Claire about what to do. Instead of having time and energy to focus on her own life she felt consumed by the needs and issues of her friends.
The other thing that she was doing, which is very common for sensitive people to do, is that in her effort to help her friends she was energetically taking on their emotions and running them through her system. Almost like an unconscious way of saying “I will help you feel better by taking this from you”—and her friends were unconsiously handing these emotions to her because they felt they did not know how to manage them on their own. After they would talk to her–her friends would feel better—lighter and Claire felt more agitated. It is no wonder that by the end of the semester she was exhausted.
Claire was relieved to understand why she was feeling so exhausted and it now made sense why she had the strong desire to be alone. She was nervous about going back to school and getting into the same situation all over again. What we did first was help her develop ways to protect herself energetically from the strong emotions of those around her. I had her imagine a protective shield around her own energy field—which extends about two feet around the perimeter of her body. I had her just feel herself nestled in her own energy field—letting go of any outside energetic influences.
Sometimes people who are energetically sensitive will expand their energy field throughout the whole house so that they are in tune with everybody in the house. So I had her practice bringing her energy field in so that is just surrounding her own body.
The other thing taught her was how to ground herself. We are designed to have a strong continuous connection with the Earth–when we have this we are grounded. When we are grounded we are able easily discharge energy that we pick up from others. If we are ungrounded we just hold this energy inside and it starts to feel very uncomfortable–oftentimes it feels like anxiety or even a panic attack. Many people that I work with that are anxious are just very energetically sensitive and haven’t learned how to manage this. To ground I had her imagine roots extending down from her feet—through the floor into the earth—with each exhale imagining those roots extending deeper and deeper. I also had her imagine a root extending from the base of her spine into the earth as well. I suggested she walk outside regularly–ideally in nature–which naturally would ground her. We can also ground by physical movement—like dancing or running—we can ground through singing. Cooking food and eating can be grounding.
Sometimes very energetically sensitive people who haven’t learned to consciously ground or how to protect their energy will use eating food as a way to ground themselves–the extra weight can both serve as an attempt to ground and provide a buffer to the energy they feel so strongly around them.
The other thing we needed to address was her belief system around her friends and their problems. She felt that if she didn’t help her friends that they wouldn’t like her and that she wouldn’t be considered a good friend. We talked about trusting that her friends had incredible inner resources inside of them that they could tap into to help with their problems. Claire could stay focused on this while she was with them—being more of a support for them to find their own answers rather than figuring it out for them. She could also reassure herself that she was a good friend–even if they were mad at her. We defined a good friend as someone who supports the highest good of another person. By her not caretaking the other person and their feelings she was supporting their highest good as well as her own. We discussed how it may take time for her friends to adjust to her new behavior but that ultimately her changes were helping the friendships to become healthier.
The other thing she could do was to stay focused on her own life and her own self-care. If she developed a schedule for the day and one of her friends asked for support—if she didn’t have time she would have to lovingly say to them “I would really love to talk with you but my schedule is full today—I would have time in the morning to talk.” By honoring her own life and schedule she was engaging in good self-care—and actually strengthening her own energetic boundaries.
People who are energetically sensitive have to have really good self-care to stay balanced. They need to have enough rest, enough quiet time, enough exercise, eat the right foods and make sure they are around people and situations that aren’t jarring to their energy–plus regularly ground and protect their energy field. The earlier they recognize this and know that this self-care is essential and not optional–the easier their life will be.
If you are energetically sensitive—what do you do to take care of yourself? We would love to hear from you!
March 11th, 2011, by Shelley Riutta
“No one ever achieved greatness by playing it safe.” Harry Gray
When we think of releasing–oftentimes it is about releasing the past, releasing limiting beliefs–essentially letting go of something negative. But what about releasing something inside of us that needs to be brought forward and expressed? One definition of “releasing” is to ‘set free from confinement or bondage’. Is your own Inner Greatness being held back and confined–being held in bondage?
Here are some symptoms that you may have that reflect you ARE holding your Inner Greatness back:
- You feel very stuck and frustrated
- You yearn for something much more in your life–something grander than what you are experiencing (you are yearning for expression of your Greatness)
- You have self-doubt and question your capabilities (this means your not seeing your Greatness)
- You are having problems with abundance–not enough money flowing to you (when you fully express your Greatness–abundance is a natural consequence)
- You are getting jealous of others who are fully expressing their Greatness
- You don’t take action in alignment with your Greatness–ie You hide out and play small
If you catch yourself doing some or all of the above you should put yourself on a “Greatness Alert” and do the following. Tips to Release Your Greatness
- Trust that because you exist–you have this Greatness within you–no one is exempt from this–no one! Look in the mirror and say “I came from Greatness (the Divine) and I have that very same Greatness(spark of the Divine) within me.
- Let your Greatness flow through you unrestricted by your Self-Judgment. Let go of any self-judgment–it will hold back the free flow of your Greatness
- Just because others hold themselves back doesn’t mean you have to. Many people hold back their Greatness and get so disconnected from it they don’t even believe it is even there. By you connecting with your Greatness you will inspire them to do the same.
- Take Action that is in Alignment with your Greatness. Ask if I were fully connected with my Greatness right now–what decision would I make here–what would I do?
- Consciously Cultivate your Connection with the larger Greatness (the Divine) that is Supporting you to Express your Greatness. The Divine, the Universe is on your side–wanting you to express your Greatness Full out–expressing your Love, Your Creativity and Your Joy. Close your eyes and feel this loving support with you RIGHT NOW.
By feeling this loving support from the Divine–it will give you the courage to step into the Greatness that you were meant to express and be!
March 10th, 2011, by Shelley Riutta
The key to shifting our lives is changing our conditioned thoughts and patterns with how we view ourselves and how we view what is possible. When we are in our conditioned self we will view ourselves through the lens of judgment and we will perceive what is possible for us as very limited. Thoughts like “I could never reach my dreams” “I’m not capable of doing that” “That will NEVER happen for me” or “I don’t have what is takes to really do what I want to do”.
A great way to quickly shift yourself out of this negativity is to put positive statement and phrases into a song–or a catchy phrase you sing. You can sing “I am amazing and I am creating the life of my dreams” or one that I got from inspirational singer Karen Drucker from her Songs of the Spirit II CD is “Money is coming to me easily and effortlessly money is coming to me!” It doesn’t have to rhyme—you don’t have to be a fabulous singer (although I believe everyone is a fabulous singer!) Have fun with it and make up your own inspirational songs. A great place to do this is in the car—you can really belt it out then!! Have fun with it—create your own songs and sing them LOUD. The more you occupy yourself with your positive songs–the more you will crowd the airways so the negativity can’t take hold and keep you down. It will also lift your vibration very high and it will be impossible for you to feel down!
Have fun and Sing Your Songs about what you want and the more you sing them—the more you will begin to believe them–and before you know it you will have Sung yourself into your Wildest Dreams!
I would love to hear what your songs are!
March 7th, 2011, by Shelley Riutta
Over the years of working with clients I have noticed something about people who have chronic money issues. These people tend to have a deep addiction to a victim pattern. Now I know that this is a tough pill to swallow if you are struggling with money right now–but it is important to address it at the root cause otherwise the pattern will just continue. If you struggle with money issues–it is giving you feedback that you have a victim pattern that needs to be addressed. Even if your money issues are not huge—but you are frustrated in this area of your life—it means you are stuck in a victim pattern.
One of the things to do to shift out of this pattern is to first take 100% responsibility for the status of your financial life. Let go of blame of others or circumstances and get that you have created this situation. The good news is that once you get that you have created it–you move into empowerment and know that you can create something different as well. Your financial life is an outpicturing of your thoughts—your thoughts about money and about yourself. These thoughts determine your actions and these actions will lead to results. So your money issues no matter how small or big are giving you feedback that your thoughts which lead to your actions are off track. These thoughts and actions can be so subtle that it can be difficult to get that you are the one creating what you are experiencing.
Let me illustrate this:
Example: Cindy can never get ahead financially. She always seems to have more bills than money coming in at the end of the month. This has been going on for as long as she can remember. As we worked together we discovered that Cindy didn’t really value herself and her deservability around having enough money. She remembers her single Mom struggling when she was a child and she thought that–that was just the way it is for women–they just weren’t meant to have enough money. Unfortunately Cindy’s Mom didn’t value herself enough to take positive action to bring more money in–she stayed stuck in a painful situation her whole life. Her Mom was stuck in a victim pattern and didn’t chose to get help to shift out of it. Cindy was able to see that because of her experiences as a child she felt less than and that she didn’t deserve abundance–and repeated the pattern of her Mother by feeling helpless over changing this. The first step was for her to acknowledge that she was recreating this situation for herself.
The importance of this is that if you blame outside circumstances–the economy, your job, your boss etc–you are stuck in a victim position and from this place you will never make the needed changes to bring in abundance. Once Cindy acknowledged that she was the one creating this–she was both relieved and excited. She knew that if she was the one creating her situation–then she could “uncreate” it and create something different. We explored what she wanted to create instead and it was that she wanted to make $10,000 more a year and that she wanted a surplus of money at the end of the month so she could save and invest. The next step was for her to open up to valuing herself and her gifts at a deep level. She wrote out all of her wonderful intrinsic qualities and also all of her gifts and talents. She worked on seeing that she deserved ease and abundance in her life–she used that as an affirmation “I deserve ease and abundance in my life”. She also used the affirmations “I easily bring in $10,000 this year” and “I have a surplus of money at the end of the month that I save and invest.” The next step was for her to brainstorm ways that she could bring in the extra $10,000 a year—these were her ideas—asking for a raise at work, starting a side business that she had been thinking about, selling some furniture she had in the basement, finding a different job that paid more. As she brainstormed she felt more and more empowered. She realized that she was capable of bringing in more money–and that she had many different ways of doing that.
The final thing we did I guided her in an imagery where she opened up to all channels of abundance for herself—that she opened up to money coming to her in magical and unexpected ways–I had her release her beliefs about how money could only come through one channel–her job–and open up to every possible way–and particularly the magical ways. After a month of working on this issue she came to her session beaming—she had brought in $2000 extra dollars! This came in a variety of ways–including her Aunt sending her a $500 check out of the blue! Cindy felt excited, empowered and ecstatic that she had finally stepped out of this stuck pattern that caused her and her Mother so much pain.
Make a decision today to take 100% responsibility for what is happening in your financial life. Now decide what you would like to create instead and take action to bring this into your life!
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