August 27th, 2010, by Shelley Riutta
“Only passions, great passions, can elevate the soul to great things” Dennis Diderot
I have gotten the question lately “Can I really make money at my life purpose–my passion?” And my answer is YES! I remember hearing about a study that compared people who followed a career path to strictly make money vs. people who followed their passion. At the end of their careers the people that had followed their passion made more money overall than the folks who had pursued a career just for the money.
I remember when I was contemplating what to study in college—my own fears had initially prevented me from pursuing the counseling field because of fears of not being able to make money. I had watched my Mom struggle financially as a single parent and I did not want to have that same kind of experience.
After getting my degree in business–I decided after a long process of soul searching to follow my passion of being a psychotherapist. Every step of the way since then I have continued to follow my passion–in the face of someone saying I could make more money doing it a different way.
An example of this is when I was contemplating graduate schools I had 3 choices–getting a degree in psychology, counseling or social work. Everyone advised me to get my degree in social work because it would be more “marketable” and insurance companies would be more apt to reimburse someone with this degree. I looked at the content of all of the programs and decided the counseling program was more in alignment with what I was looking for. It was hands on—with lots of practice counseling. The social work program didn’t have as much of this and focused more on social policy.
I decided to do what felt intuitively right to do and I am so glad I did! The counseling program that I went to was a perfect fit for me–I loved the program, my classmates and I met one of my most important mentors, Pat Robertson.
What is ironic now is that the issue of being able to accept insurance is a mute point because I have never directly billed out for insurance. My practice for the last 10 years has been all self-pay. I know now that I am making more money now than I ever would have made following my business path–and even if I would have gotten my degree in social work and billed insurance!
There is something inside of us–in our Authentic Self that is aligned with our true path. When we follow this we will be supported. It means keeping ourselves inwardly focused and making decisions on what feels intuitively right to us. It took me a year of personal growth work after I had gotten my business degree to connect deeply with my Authentic Self. Once I did and got clear about my path I took action and never looked back.
Here are some tips on how to make money at your Life Purpose:
1. Stay with it and persevere. If it is your passion you are more likely to hang in there and do the work you need to do to be successful. And best of all, because it is your passion–it won’t feel like work:)
2. If you have a full-time job and want to pursue your passion start developing it part-time and once you are making enough money with you passion you can quit your job!
3. Be willing to learn from others who are successful doing what your passion is. If you say—there is no way I could make money at my passion—I bet there is someone out there who is—find them and learn from them.
4. Be willing to invest in your personal growth as you pursue your passion. The more you let go of limiting, conditioned beliefs the more your career will flourish.
5. Be willing to release limiting beliefs around money. Read books, take workshops to help yourself be free of beliefs that limit how much money you make. The only limits are what you place on yourself.
6. Be willing to develop skills as a business person if you are pursuing your passion as a business. Treat it like a business and learn all the aspects of what it takes to run a successful business.
7. Be willing to self-promote. Let people know what your passion is and that you are good at it. Believe in yourself and your gifts—-you have them for a reason—and that is to share these gifts with others.
8. As your business expands, hire an assistant. Don’t try to do it all yourself—get support for yourself.
Here is to you following your passion AND being prosperous!
August 27th, 2010, by Shelley Riutta
August 27th, 2010, by Shelley Riutta
August 7th, 2010, by Shelley Riutta
We live in a fast paced, hectic world where it is very easy to lose sight of each other and the special bonds we have. The power of positive, mindful rituals can strengthen our connections with each other and provide on-going ways to stay connected.
I just returned from my annual Sister’s weekend–where I get together with my 35 year old sister and 21 year old sister. It is something I look forward to every summer and it is a guaranteed time that we have together to have fun and deepen the connection we have.
There is something about an extended visit that allows for deeper sharing than typically happens on short visits. There are things that I find out about my sisters only during these Sister’s weekends—even though we are close and talk a lot during the rest of the year.
We spent time trying to figure out how many years we have been doing our Sisters Weekend ritual. We had fun remembering the goofy times we had and even talked about some hurts that had never been revealed before. When I reflected on the power of this annual ritual I began to think of all of the other opportunities to create positive rituals in our lives.
Here are some examples of positive rituals that you can create in your life to strengthen your relationships:
1. Hug and kiss your honey mindfully when you part from each other during the day. Be present and feel your love from them as you kiss.
2. Create a weekly date night or family night where you do something special together. You can take turns planning this.
3. Follow rituals you enjoyed from your own family and create new ones that are unique to you and your family
4.Think of silly rituals–celebrate an obscure Holiday or an event every year. I have friends who have a Mardi Gras party every year–which is a fun celebration in the winter in Wisconsin
5. Celebrate anniversarys that are important to you. The day you met your sweetie, the day you stopped drinking. Think of days you want to honor every year and create a ritual to honor it.
6. Release rituals that no longer have meaning for you that you continue because of expectations from other people. This frees you up to create rituals that have true meaning for you and those you love.
7. Create a ritual of fun on one day on the weekend. It could be afternoons on Sunday are only for doing fun things.
8. Create fun rituals in your neighborhood. I have a neighbors who have a yearly Winter Solstice party that brings the whole neighborhood together to have fun and celebrate.
Be creative and think of meaningful or fun ways to celebrate the connection you have with those you love.
I would love to hear about any rituals that you already celebrate in your life. Please post below:)
August 6th, 2010, by Shelley Riutta
July 6th, 2010, by Shelley Riutta
Carol was in her 40′s and struggled with her weight since she was a child. She binged on sweets and couldn’t seem to control herself. She called me for some phone sessions to address this issue. In the first session it became clear what the inner dynamic was that was fueling her desire for the sweets.
Carol was very hard on herself and put pressure on herself to be perfect all of the time. She felt if she was perfect she would then be loveable and acceptable to the people around her. This was a reflection of the way her Mom treated her. When she was young her Mom didn’t see her clearly-and put pressure on her to be perfect–the message was “If you are perfect, then I will love you and accept you.” Because of the pain of not being loved unconditionally for who she really was and the pressure from her Mom to be perfect- she began to use sweets as a child to comfort herself.
This pattern continued into adulthood and was confusing for Carol because her Mom was no longer in her life and she was surrounded by people who truly did love her unconditionally. Carol was able to realize that she had a conditioned part of her that was just like her Mom-putting pressure on her to be perfect and not seeing her own intrinsic worth and loveability just as she was. This pressure was creating a lot of anxiety within her and to cope with it she overate the sweets to comfort herself.
Once she recognized this she was able to shift into being more loving and supportive with herself-much like she was able to be with her own children. She gave herself messages like “It’s OK to be you, you are loveable just the way you are.” “It’s OK not to be perfect-just relax and be yourself-you are enough just as you are.” As she gave herself these new messages she felt herself relax for the first time in years and stopped having the intense craving for sweets. She was able to understand this and heal this long-standing issue in only two sessions!
What I love about looking at the inner dialogue is that it helps to gain insight and clarity into the inner dynamic that is fueling our feelings and behavior. This clarity is about 70% of the healing. This morning as I worked with a client and we developed clarity about a long-standing pattern of hers–the feeling or incredible relief in the room was palpable. Now with awareness of the inner dynamic she had a clear path for healing and shifting the dynamic that was causing her so much pain.
Notice a long standing patterns of yours. What do you think you are saying to yourself on the inner level that is fueling this pattern–can you track the sequence of it. Example: I say this to myself–my reaction is this (ex. anxiety)-to deal with this reaction I then do this.
We are talking to ourselves all of the time–having inner dialogues that are either loving and supportive–or critical and hurtful. This type of inner reflection helps to bring these dialogues to conscious awareness so that you can make decisions to shift these dialogues to being more supportive to you.
July 4th, 2010, by Shelley Riutta
Happy 4th of July
July 4th, 2010, by Shelley Riutta
June 23rd, 2010, by Shelley Riutta
Are you a Therapist or considering being a Therapist? Then join me on Thursday June 24th at 7:00 p.m. Central for a one time FREE Tele-Class titled “Thriving Therapy Practice Secrets: 5 Simple Secrets to Creating a Thriving Therapy practice that Transforms peoples’ lives while giving you more Joy, Freedom and Income!”
In this valuable FREE call you will discover how to break free of the current climate of therapy services and create a practice you LOVE and your clients LOVE, the fastest growing type of therapy that clients are clamoring for (and are willing to pay for), tips on how to transform what you are doing so it is energizing, fun and lucrative rather than draining and frustrating…..and more.
For more details about this call go to www.therapypracticesecrets.com
June 16th, 2010, by Shelley Riutta
“The dream was always running ahead of me. To catch up, to live for a moment in unison with it, that was the miracle. ” Anais Nin
What would you do if you were not afraid? What risks would you take in your life? What would it look like to take a leap in your life? Many of us spend most of our time creating what we think of as safety and security in our life—having a job that pays well, having a home, saving for the future, keeping our relationships the same etc. Essentially establishing and maintaining the status quo.
Now there is nothing wrong with this except that many people tend to error on the side of not knowing when it is time to make a change—when it is time to take a leap. You see we are expansive Spirits who are here to grow, learn and express our full potential. These signals that our Spirit wants to grow are very subtle and can be easily covered over by the voice of what we “should” be doing in our life. When this happens it can lead to problems in our lives.
Here are some Signals that you may need to take a leap in your life:
- The biggest Signal is that you feel stuck and stagnant. Because we are meant to grow and expand when we stop this expansion we will feel the energy inside of us start to get “stuck”.
- 2. You tend to worry a lot. There is a lot of creative energy that wants to move within you and create—if you stop this energy from creating it has nowhere to go but into another activity like worry. So stop worrying and start creating!
- 3. You are over focused on other people and their problems. Because you don’t have a compelling leap you are making in your life you have no focal point for your energy—so you can get easily distracted by other people’s problems. If you find yourself repeatedly caught about in other people’s issues—it is a signal you need to take leap in your own life.
- 4. You feel depressed. There is passion and dreams within you that long to be felt and expressed. If you put a lid on these—you hold this energy back and you will feel depressed.
- 5. You are jealous of other people and what they are doing in their own lives. This is another signal that you have untapped dreams inside of you. Treat your jealousy as a gift, a signal that you have so much more inside of you that wants to be expressed— much more than you ever could imagine!
- 6. You have low energy. When you are not growing and expanding your energy starts to get dull and stagnate—which makes it even harder to start to make changes. The key is to move out of your inertia to begin to make the changes that your Spirit is calling to make—and to keep moving forward.
- 7. You are easily irritated and frustrated. Your Spirit can get a little cranky if you are not heeding its call for you to move forward in your life. You can blame it on your job, your mate, your kids, your relatives—but it all comes down to the core issue—you must listen to your Spirit and begin to express this beautiful energy or you will be very frustrated.
- 8. You feel hopeless. Your Spirit may be signaling that you need to Leap—but your conditioned self—your fears– block you from taking any action. Just like a little kid who wants something so badly and the parents are ignoring these desires— and not doing anything about them—the child begins to feel hopeless. The same dynamic operates inside of you. Not listening to the voice of your Spirit over and over can lead to the same kind of hopeless resignation. Instead listen to your Spirit and take action on these desires and you will feel your hope and excitement for the future begin to soar.
Learning to Fly—Flying Lessons
Lesson One: If you are confused what your Leap would be ask yourself “What is one thing that my Spirit has been quietly telling me to do for years—that I have been ignoring?” It could be something small—like “My Spirit has been telling me to exercise regularly for years”. Take action on this information because there is a wisdom in your Spirit—it knows what step needs to happen first—and this step will lead to the next—and then to the next. Before you know it these smaller steps will build a momentum that will lead you to even bigger leaps.
Lesson Two: Know that you will be uncomfortable as you take your Leaps and learn to Fly. Use this statement to help yourself “I am willing to be uncomfortable to make the changes I need to make.” The more you acknowledge that uncomfortableness is just part of the process—not a signal that you need to stop—you will be able to continue to move forward. The more you do this the more comfortable you will get with the uncomfortableness.
Lesson Three: Keep Your Eye on the Prize. As you take your Leap there will be things that may appear that seem like obstacles in your path. Your job is to keep focused on where you are going and NOT to get sidetracked into over focusing on these obstacles. When I work with clients and this happens—the more they stay on track with their vision of where they are going—the more easily these apparent obstacles just fall away.
Lesson Four: As You Leap You Will begin to Adjust to a Higher, Lighter Vibration and your Body will shed dense energy so you Can Move Higher. This can manifest in getting physically sick for a brief time as your body adjusts and releases the dense energy you have been carrying. After you get better you will feel better than you did before you got sick—you will have upleveled. You can also release this denser energy through feeling emotions of sadness, fear and anxiety. Again these emotions will quickly move through and you will feel lighter and more free after they pass through. Remember the lighter you are—the easier it is to fly!
Lesson Five: You will feel VERY supported as you take action and Leap. Once you make the decision and leap you will feel amazing levels of support come to you from the Universe. Clients of mine who had been sitting on the sidelines for years contemplating their leap are blown away with how supported they feel when they finally take action. They say to me “If I knew it was going to feel this wonderful I would have made this change years ago!” You will feel support from other people, circumstances will come together to support you in miraculous ways, doors will fly open, signals come that let you know you are on track. You will meet people who are your “flying partners”—people on your path that are uniquely supporting you by giving you enthusiastic encouragement and also practical support and information.
Lesson Six: As you Leap and Begin to Fly you will Feel a Special Joy. You are meant to be flying—soaring in your life. There is a special joy that is natural to our Spirits when we align with what we are meant to be doing in our life. It is a joyful, fulfilling feeling that we are on track in our life—exactly where we are meant to be. It is what everyone is longing for—and for good reason—this is the feeling that you are meant to be feeling each and every day.
So listen to the subtle—or not so subtle signals that you are meant to take a leap in your life. Listen and leap—trusting that as you jump you will feel a sweet support and a cheering surrounding you –lifting you to fly even higher into the magnificent life that is meant especially for you!
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